CONQUERING ACEDIA: PRAYING WHEN PRAYER SEEMS DIFFICULT.

OUTLINE 

The Concept of Acedia
Different Forms of Acedia
Acedia as Spiritual Sloth
Melancholy 
Humility 
Progressive Growth to Contemplation
The saints and Acedia
St. Teresa of Jesus
St. Therese of the Child Jesus
St. Teresa of Calcutta 
Conquering Acedia
Fervency
Spiritual Direction
Group prayer (Community)
Openness to the Spirit
Conclusion

The Concept of Acedia

The Idea of Acedia in Christendom is an age-old experience. The term Acedia is sometimes used to imply a spiritual sloth or in fact a deadly sin. However, in more contemporary times, some spiritual writers equate it with spiritual dryness. Thus, the term will be discussed to reflect both meanings separately. Basically, in this reflection, it covers the scope of spiritual repugnance or difficulty in prayer. 
There is, obviously, no need to emphasize, afresh, the importance of prayer. St. Francis teaches that, “with the strongest commitment, we cultivate 'the Spirit of holy prayer and devotion to which all temporal things must contribute'” and according to Saint John Chrysostom, “it is simply impossible to lead, without the aid of prayer, a virtuous life… it is the place of refuge for every worry, a foundation for cheerfulness, a source of constant happiness, a protection against sadness.”
Acedia, then, in this context, simply means a condition in which we find it difficult to pray be it by our own fault, conditions beyond our control or by the making of the Divine. 

Different Forms of Acedia

There are different ways in which we experience this spiritual repugnance or difficult during prayers. Few of them will be discussed here.

Acedia as Spiritual Sloth

Acedia is, first and foremost, classified as a form of Spiritual slot in which the soul feels lack of love and care towards the things of God. In ancient Monasticism, it is sometimes identified with a certain Demon, called the Noonday demon. Acedia, in this sense, most times goes with restlessness, lack of attention and in fact, lack of excitement towards anything that has to do God. The individual who experiences Spiritual sloth can be held responsible as he/she does not take much care towards the things of God. Thomas Aquinas highlights that it “denotes sorrow for spiritual good, it is evil on two counts, both in itself and in point of its effect. Consequently, it is a sin, for by sin we mean an evil movement of the appetite.” Many Saints suffered from this feeling especially like St. Anthony of Egypt. Spiritual Fathers have identified that one of the major causes of such tendencies has been routine and over-familiarity with religious practices.

Melancholy

The second cause of ill disposition towards God and his holy activity is Melancholy. Melancholy is a feeling of great sadness or depression, especially of a thoughtful or introspective nature. There is no doubt that life is full of ups and downs. This day we are happy, the next sadness encroaches. Failure happens, disappointments, and even death of loved ones. I have heard people comment that couldn’t pray for months or were angry with God over the death of a loved one. Most of this are practically beyond our control and being human we cannot help but feel the effects. Sometimes, they affect our prayer life. It can even be a foundational problem that needs to be addressed. We can be angry with ourselves, the situations of our life and even God. This to a great extent affects our communication with God if the problem is not sufficiently addressed.

Humility

St. John of the Cross in his Dark Night of the Soul Identified that there are times when God allows one to experience a deep sense of dryness for the purpose of humbling him. He states that those who are beginners in the way of the truth have a lot of weaknesses which, not due to their fault, impede their spiritual progress. Some of this weaknesses spring from the Capital sins. According to St. John many of those who set out on the part of Good do so, though unconsciously, for mere self-interest. Thus, they identify prayer with the sweetness that accompanies, they wish to use obvious and attractive religious articles, they somewhat desire to be seen doing good and they sometimes see holiness as a competition with other persons. Thus, God sets them on this path in other to purify them and make them more worthy of himself. St. John is of the opinion that this happens to everyone who takes his spiritual life seriously and to the more recollected it, happens sooner than in others. 
St. John gave some signs which can help one identify if he is passing through this experience. The first sign is that one finds no consolation in God nor in any other created thing. Thus, God takes all pleasure from him in other to purify him. The second sign is that the individual so much desires to pray and please God with so much painful care but the person feels bad that he is not praying since he is not feeling any pleasure from it. This is because the individual has identified true prayer with the pleasure that comes from it. The final sign is that the subject cannot meditate or reflect in the imaginative sphere as God tries to communicate with him directly without the obstruction of the senses. This, however, does not last so long. It can linger for few days and then, one is able to continue his normal life of prayer. However, in those that God wants to lead to infused contemplation, it can last for years.

Progressive Growth to Contemplation

The Last type of Spiritual Aridity that the Saints have exclaimed is the sort that those whom God has set on the path of Infused Contemplation experiences. St. John of the Cross when reflecting on this deep purgation exclaims, “Oh happy Night that guided me, oh night more lovely than the dawn, oh night that joined the Beloved with Lover, Lover transformed in the Beloved. The Saint explained that the main cause of this deep aridity is the fact that God is communicating to the Individual directly to the Spirit and since the individual is used to Sensual pleasure during prayers, the whole business is foreign to him. It’s more like Plato’s Allegory of the Cave. Other signs that may accompany it apart from those that are being experienced by the previous purgation, is the individual’s inability to communicate what is happening to him, as he so much feels that he is leaving the path of good. John adds that very few people experience this and because of this, many spiritual directors lack the experience to direct them. Sometimes, it is accompanied with anger and so much spiritual anguish and it lasts for years. Many people, therefore, abandon the path of good since they do not understand themselves and no one understands them.

The Saints and Acedia

We practically need not to be discouraged in our struggle for righteousness because of Acedia in any form of it, be it by own spiritual sloth and by the influence of God. This is because we have many clouds of witnesses in the persons of the Saints who have passed through the same experience. 

St. Teresa of Jesus

St. Teresa of Avila, as glorious as she is, wrote in her autobiography of her struggle with the spirit of sloth through her own fault and this affected her life of prayer in her early days in the convent. She said that in her convent, many sisters liked to gossip and focus on other sisters’ sins and that the convent was worldly. This in a great way affected her life of prayer and devotion, making it difficult for her to pray. Even when she was sick of malaria, she found it as an excuse not to pray even after recovery. Thus, she used to excuse and complains to shield herself from the truth. At a stage in her life, she had to brace-up and find help through the help of a spiritual director. This was an example of Spiritual sloth.

St. Therese of the Child Jesus

The Little flower was not left out of the scene, she said in her autobiography, “I must tell you about my retreat for profession. Far from experiencing any consolation, complete aridity – desolation, almost – was my lot. Jesus was asleep in my little boat as usual. How rarely souls let him sleep peacefully within them. Their agitation and all their requests have so tired out the Good Master that He is only too glad to enjoy the rest I offer him. I do not suppose He will wake up until my eternal retreat, but instead of making me sad, it makes me very happy. Such an attitude of mind proves that I am far from being a saint. I should not rejoice in my aridity, but rather consider it as the result of lack of fervor and fidelity, while the fact that I often fall asleep during meditation or while making my thanksgiving should appall me. Well, I am not appalled’ I bear in mind that little children are just as pleasing to their parents asleep as awake, that doctors put their patients to sleep while they perform operations, and that after all, ‘the Lord knows our frame. He remembers that we are but dust.” The use of the term as usual by the Saint, shows that the issue of aridity was a steady one for her.

St. Teresa of Calcutta 

St. Teresa of Calcutta is known for her heroic love and service to the poor but only a few knew about her internal struggles with the spiritual dryness and sorrow. She wrote in her letter to her spiritual director in 1957, “In the darkness…Lord, my God, who am I that you should forsake me? The child of your love – and now become as the most hated one. The one – you have thrown away as unwanted – unloved. I call, I cling, I want and there is no one to answer…Where I try to raise my thoughts to heaven, there is such convicting emptiness that those very thoughts return like sharp knives and hurt my very soul. Love – the word – it brings nothing. I am told God lives in me – and yet the reality of darkness and coldness and emptiness is so great that nothing touches my soul. 
St. John of the Cross suffered from similar trials for many years as well as other saints like Padre Pio. 

Conquering Acedia

St. Alphonsus Ligouri on this note said, “This, then, is your answer whenever you feel tempted to stop praying because it seems to be a waste of time: ‘I am here to please God.’” It is of great importance to note that God requires fidelity from us in the midst of our greatest aridity. It is both a test of Love for him and a perseverance that will lead us to greater heights of holiness. St Francis de Sales notes, “our actions are like roses, which when fresh have more beauty but when dry have more strength and sweetness. In like manner, our works performed with tenderness of heart are more agreeable to ourselves – to ourselves, I say, who regard only our own satisfaction. Yet when performed in times of dryness, they possess more sweetness and become more precious in the sight of God.”

Fervency

St. John Vianney told us, “If you find it impossible to pray, hide behind your good angel, and charge him to pray in your stead.” It is a matter of determination. When we find ourselves falling apart from the way of Truth through our own fault, what do we do to re-trace our steps. It is a call to look up to God, apologize and re-instate our commitment. St. Anthony of Egypt, in this regard said, “Keep what I command you: wherever you go, always keep God before your eyes; whatever you do, consider the testimony of Holy Scriptures; and wherever you are, do not be moved easily. Keep these three things and you will be safe”

Spiritual Direction

The Spiritual fathers always emphasize the importance of a good spiritual director. Thomas Merton tells us, “The whole purpose of spiritual direction is to penetrate beneath the surface of a man’s life, to get behind the façade of conventional gestures and attitudes which he presents to the world, and to bring out his inner spiritual freedom, his inmost truth, which is what we call the likeness of Christ in his soul.” Thus, with the aid of our a good, intellectually sound and spirit filled spiritual director, one can be able to make a quality discernment about his life and push forward to lead a more glorious life. As Richard Scott says spiritual direction helps to us “know what to do… (and) the capacity to do it.”

Group prayer (Community)

Another important aid when prayer is difficult is praying in group. We have the Church and family to help us. However, there is no harm in having a friend with whom we can pray together in our private times. Even if the partnership is about reminding each other of the importance of prayer and Communion with God. St. John Bosco talks about his friend with whom he prayed together during his seminary days. The friend died as a seminarian. One night, he appeared to Don Bosco to inform him that he is waiting for him in heaven.

Openness to the Spirit

St. John of the Cross tells us, “God values in you an inclination to aridity and suffering for love of Him more than all possible consolations, spiritual visions and meditations.” For those whom God wishes to bring into the pure state and light of infused contemplation. The only word for them, is to be firm, patient and sober. John of the Cross advises that such souls should not make much effort to bring about the spirit of sweetness by their own power. However, they should pray to the good God with a sober heart, hoping that he visits them on time. Instead of making an effort to meditate, they should in fact, follow the injunctions of Psalm 46, “be still and know that I am God.” And even if remaining quiet and still during prayers makes them feel that they are wasting their time, let them, however, persevere in it with sincere hope and sober spirit. They should seek the counsel of deep spiritual fathers and wait in silence for God. For as John of the Cross says, there effort to maintain their usual mental prayers will only inhibit the gracious effort of God in their lives and leave them with more sorrow.

Conclusion

In Conclusion, let us heed the teaching of the Church in the Catechism of the Catholic Church paragraph 2731, It says, “Dryness belongs to contemplative prayer when the heart is separated from God, with no taste for thoughts, memories and feelings, even spiritual ones. This is the moment of sheer faith clinging faithfully to Jesus in His agony and in his tomb. ‘Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.’ If dryness is due to the lack of roots, because the word has fallen on rocky soil, the battle requires conversion.” This, then, is a call to stand firm, retrace our steps and make amends, when necessary, in our journey to intimacy with God.

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